What to eat while you are watching Fall TV

I know we are supposed to be posting about Fall TV this week. And I feel like I have a bigger post in me about TV, but it just not ready yet. I take TV very seriously. It involves spreadsheets, highlighters, the Entertainment Weekly Fall TV issue and a lot of prayer. And that hasn't happened yet and I had a long day at work (and I forgot to write this post last night) and I just don't want to give you a half-hearted TV post, you know? I promise you a really good, thorough analysis of the Fall TV season soon.

But...I do have something to endorse. It's a Food Truck And it's the perfect thing to eat while discussing Breaking Bad. Or watching Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Or pondering who's next to go on The Walking Dead. It's called Sweeto Burrito.

Full disclosure: Christian, the owner of Sweeto Burrito, is a good friend of mine. And one day when I showed up at his house, there was a food truck parked outside. I guess owning and operating food trucks is Christian's "thing" now. And it should be. Because he's a good businessman, and dang, these are some good burritos. 

Tonight, I had the Buff Chick. Its fried chicken pieces, buffalo sauce, cilantro ranch dressing, tater tots and cheese. In a burrito. Yes. I said tater tots. It was sweet and spicy and crunchy and satisfying. I've also partaken in the Smokehouse, which is Sweeto's unreal smoked chicken, cilantro ranch, ONION RINGS, cheddar cheese, the tastes of freedom and magic all wrapped up in a flour tortilla. Fantastic. I want to go there every day and eat everything. (And not all the burritos contained a fried starch on the inside, though the best ones do.)

So if you live in, near, around or within reasonable (5 hours?) driving distance of Provo, Utah. You should go visit Sweeto. Go like their FB page and click around the menu. I wish I could be like Oprah and that I could give you all free burritos if you told them Josh sent you.  But I can't. But don't worry, you will be happy you went. And if Christian is working, he has some interesting thoughts about Breaking Bad. You should ask him. 

battle of the bulge

First off, I apologize for the title. Bulge might be the worst word ever. Say it a bunch of times. It's really the worst.


Like many of you, I'm paranoid to turn on the news and see that someone has used my fat belly as stock footage for a segment on obesity. It literally pushes me to go to the gym every morning. I'm not going to be that fat guy, even if they don't show my face! I refuse to be objectified. I'm also always on the lookout for low-lying camera operators.

I have come up with a series of tips to lose weight. Are you proud of me? You should be! I haven't actually lost any weight, but I feel GREAT. Here's a few thoughts:

1. When I eat at fast food establishments (every day - I'm super busy) I order a combo but I only eat HALF of the fries. You have to sacrifice!

2. When my kids want to play at a friends house, even if it's a block away, I'll drive them there. But I'll scoop them up out of the car and carry them to the door! Even Miles. You should see my arms!

3. I wear light, loose fitting clothes so that when I weigh myself I weigh less.

4. I "think thin" like French ladies do. It's all in your mind. I also wear clothes for thin people because that tricks everyone into thinking I'm thin, too. Size small t-shirts from Target seem to really slim me up.

5. Have you guys played Just Dance on the wii? What are you waiting for? It's a riot - and what a workout! I like to do one song, and then I watch my kids do about a hundred. It's really great family time.

6. Even when I'm in front of the computer I keep working out! I constantly flex my glutes. I'm doing it right now!

7. When my doctor says I'm a "bit high" in my obesity range during a check-up, I remember that he's a hater and just jealous.

8. I try not to be an emotional eater. I do this by cutting out ALL EMOTIONS. I feel nothing. I am a robot. If you ever see me crying it's because I'm just acting. (Remember - I'm a trained actor!)

9. I will never judge anyone for being overweight, because I understand their struggle. But I try to be proactive and remind them to "try a little harder," and sometimes I will pinch their tummies (good naturedly) just to say "you can do it!"

10. I only eat Lean Cuisines for lunch. Well, Lean Cuisines and a giant donut for dessert.

These are just some things that work for me. What are your diet tips?