I (think I) Am a Winner!!

I have always been an optimist. And a bit of a dreamer. My wife is definitely the pragmatist in our relationship. I always kind of imagine that the best will happen. And lately I have noticed that this manifests itself in an odd way: I think I am going to win every contest I enter. I don't just hope I will win. Or fantasize that I will win. I LITERALLY think I am going to win. This week Apple is giving away a $10,000 iTunes gift card to the person who downloads the 50,000,000,000 app. I have downloaded about 100 free apps this week to increase my odds and have already planned out how I plan on spending the $10,000. I even checked to make sure my phone number is up-to-date on my Apple account to make it easy for them to call me. I also am sure I am going to win $200 from the Beehive Bazaar for their #secondweekend contest. (They were doing the same giveaway last weekend and I had already decided how I was spending that gift card...which I didn't win. ) I am waiting for an email from the Pioneer Woman telling me I won a Kitchenaid. And I still am wondering why HGTV hasn't called me to tell me I won the Dream Home 2013. (Every year I spend lots of hours contemplating if I will actually move to the Dream Home, if I will keep it as a vacation home, or if I will sell it.)

This winning feeling is in no way based on fact or truth. I have literally won 3 things in my whole life: An early copy of a book called After the Golden Age. The Lower Lights first CD. And a weeks worth of free vegetables from a CSA. 3 wins out of 1.5 million entries in various contests, giveaways, etc. and you would think I would have a little perspective. Not be SO SURE that I am going to win every time I enter something.

Last year when I was out of work for a year, I did the same thing. I would simply apply for a job, and before they company had even called me to set up an initial interview, I would already be working there in my mind. I would plan what I was going to buy first with my company discount, and try and figure out where I would stop for diet cokes on my morning commute. And then the company would never call me and I would never even interview, let alone come close to getting the job.

Is this a good thing? I'm not sure. I guess it's good to be hopeful. But I am actually kind surprised (and bummed) when I don't win these things. Even as I am writing this I am thinking how funny it will be when a few hours after I publish this I get a call from both Apple and the Beehive Bazaar telling me that I won my $10,000 and my $200 respectively. Because clearly I am going to win, right?